


Show Them How You Smile

by KurainoHikaru



Category: RWBY
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anti-Faunus Racism (RWBY), Character Study, Ilia Backstory, M/M, Minor Character Death, Minor Violence, Prompt mayhem challenge, Seamonkeys because I'm trash and can't not insert them, Several Original Characters - Freeform, Social Hierarchy, crying. lots of crying, it's pretty minor though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-12
Updated: 2018-12-12
Packaged: 2019-09-17 00:52:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16964664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KurainoHikaru/pseuds/KurainoHikaru
Summary: "She recalled the day her parents told her of her enrollment like a chilling stab, a painful, numbing, and ever-present reminder of happier times."





	Show Them How You Smile

**Author's Note:**

> My entry in the Prompt Mayhem Challenge/ Secret Santa Exchange hosted by LadyValhalla's RWBY writers and artists discord!

 

Ilia watched her lifelong friend board the Argus Limited with a forlorn smile from the second level archway, knowing she was where she needed to be as a slight pang in her chest at the reminder that it wasn’t with her.

_Stop that, we’re moving forward now, not staring backward._

Giving herself a quick shake she thought of what the future held for her, with the new leadership of the White Fang. There was much that she knew she had to atone for, but she knew that she was worth that atonement,

_“It’s up to you to take the progress and keep running with it.”_

Ilia smiled at the resolute faith Blake had in them, in her. As much as Blake had suffered alongside them, she never found it difficult to reaffirm trust in those who had turned their back on her, something Ilia could never fully accomplish herself.

“She really is something, huh?”

Try as she might, Ilia couldn’t hide the shock of the voice intruding on her thoughts as she turned to face a boisterous Sun, his blue-haired teammate close in tow behind. She failed to recall his name after his shameless attempt at flirting that Ilia quickly tuned out after the abysmal pun he made in regards to her Faunus traits.

“Y-yeah,” she stuttered out hoping that she didn’t sound as unconvincing as she felt.

Sun raised an eyebrow at the peculiar forcefulness of the word but before he could address it, she spoke again.

“So what are you two planning to do now that everything has calmed down?”

Ilia hoped the distraction would pull Sun’s attention away from her less than subtle startling. She had discerned from conversations with Blake that Sun, while dorky and sometimes blatantly inappropriate, was very observant and smart when it came to emotions, her friend even made a point to say how she was unsure what would have happened had he not tagged along without permission.

“Well provided my illustrious leader can calm down for all of five minutes long enough for us to hash out some travel plans,” Neptune trailed off in mock annoyance, his smirk giving away it was a playful jab.

Sun seemed unperturbed by the jab as he explained, “We’re planning on heading to Shade Academy in Vacuo, been a while since I’ve been back home,” Sun explained with the slightest hint of melancholy that, while not unnoticed, wasn’t addressed.

“Though we need to get in contact with Scar and Sage before we leave. I’m sure they’d love to tear into you for how long it took you to ‘catch up’.” Neptune jabbed again, smirk absent this time.

“Dude for the last time I told you-”

Ilia hummed in affirmation as she tuned out their bickering. She thought of how her life may have been different if her family had decided to brave the barren wastelands as opposed to the so-called “City of Dreams.” She recalled the day her parents told her of her enrollment like a chilling stab, a painful, numbing, and ever-present reminder of happier times.

* * *

 

“Ilia darling, come downstairs. We have a surprise for you!”

Ilia laid down the latest copy of Atlas Mechanics and Engineering as she hopped off her bed, she raced downstairs in excitement, eager to see what the surprise was, she seldom received them after all.

She was greeted by her mother who wore a deep smile, so warm it could be seen in her crystal blue eyes. Ilia’s excitement evident as her skin took on an orange hue and her hair a light purple as she hopped back and forth alternating on one foot exclaiming,

“What is it? What is it?! What is it?!?”

"Calm down. You're going to get hair everywhere," her mother chuckled as she pointed to the hair that bounced alongside her daughter's back echoing her joy as she turned towards the counter, "Honestly the fact you can function like that without tying it up into a ponytail evades me to this day. Doesn't it bother you, dearie?"

She shook her head with exuberance. “It looks so much prettier like this though! Don’t you think so too daddy,” she asked as she looked to her father seated in an armoire across the room. His glasses and helmet laid carefully to his side as his shoulders relaxed into the sofa.

“Oh let her look pretty dear, she shouldn’t have to be the practical working woman you are just yet. Besides everyone should know how much of a princess our daughter is, the entire mining community loves her as one.”

Her mother stalked over to him with poised grace. “Whatever you say, _Mr. Amitola,”_ she whispered as she laid a kiss on his cheek, sitting on the arm of the recliner.

Ilia pouted as they ignored her excitement in favor of being gross in front of her and it showed. Her irritation evident as her skin took on a yellow pallor.

“I think you’d better stop teasing our princess before she turns into a little monster, _Mrs. Amitola._ ”

She rolled her eyes before returning her attention to her daughter, “Come my little gremlin,” beckoning to her daughter lovingly with gesture holding out an envelope in her other hand.

Ilia wasted no time before jumping into her father’s lap and all but snatching the letter out of her mother’s waiting hand.

She tore the letter open with such speed one would think she had practiced it in her bedroom every night before bed as she eagerly unfolded the letter that lay beneath the now destroyed envelope.

Her mother wrapped an arm around her father’s shoulders as they eagerly watched their daughter’s face as her gray eyes filled with at first surprise, and then delight as her body changed back to the orange she was in her initial excitement, she looked up to her parents, a silent question. Both of them nodded and the smile that broke on her face afterward made everything they did to get that letter worth it.

Ilia jumped off of her father’s lap, much to his chagrin that he voiced with a grunt, as she started rambling all the things she would be able to do, to see.

“The city of dreams, I can’t believe it! I wonder if I’ll meet any kids like me there,” she mused out loud.

Her parents shared a look at that, unsure how to broach the topic, neither willing to dampen their daughter’s excitement.

“Ilia, my little rainbow we’re so proud and excited of you, not that we had any doubts you would with your brilliance,” her father started.

“Chunkshi, come sit with us, there are a few things we need to tell you in preparation for your exciting time at school,” her mother finished.

Ilia was no fool. She knew that when both her parents used their precious nicknames for her in succession that something wasn’t right and she cautiously climbed to the opposite arm of her mother and waited.

"Atlas is… different than the community we have here. You like how we are all friends and have each other over for dinner sometimes yes?”

Ilia nodded at her mother, confused what she was implying.

“Well, not everyone is as friendly as they are. Atlas is one of the most advanced places on Remnant but that advancement comes with… some challenged ways of thinking.” her mother grunted out with some effort.

“What do you mean? Are you saying I can’t go? That there’s something wrong with Atlas… with me?”

Her father captured his daughter in his the safety his wide arms provided as he stroked his hand through his child’s now blue hair.

“Never! There could never be anything wrong with you. You’re as perfect as the wind and sky, my rainbow. Some people just don’t understand us as we are, and they don’t want to see those different from them, they treat us like we’re out of place.”

"But we have a chance to make that right, make it better for you. That's why we want you to have an opportunity to get out of here and really get to explore the real world as you've always wanted to, maybe even be featured on that magazine you love reading one of these days." her mother mused as she remembered catching her daughter reading the magazine well past her bedtime for the first time.

Ilia reveled at the thought. Her? An engineer? She could only dream of what the feeling of coming to her own home after a long day's work on the undercarriage of a dust-cycle or on the inside of a mechsuit would be like.

“I’m confused. You say that people like me, l-like us aren’t like them but that you still want me to go. What do you want me to do.” she looked up at her parents, eyes damp but she wouldn’t let them fall.

“Now, now none of that my dear. What do we always tell you?”

Ilia wiped her eyes, feigning annoyance as she dazzled her parents as they taught her,

“Show them how you smile.”

“That’s right. Now here’s what we’re going to do.”

And so they set the groundwork for what would be Ilia’s time in the City of Dreams, and what she would do to succeed in the kingdom of man, the rest of her life ahead of her.

Or at least that’s what should have been.

* * *

 

“-think how that made us feel?!”

“Of course I did! You think it was easy to be gone so long? It tore me apart every week that kept passing where I wasn’t even sure if any of you were okay! I’m not naïve Nep I just- she needed someone.”

Neptune sighed, defeated. “I know she did, but did you think about the fact that we, no that I needed you too,” his voice had all but gone silent by the end of the statement.

Sun went stock still at that, never hearing his suave partner sound so haggard.

Ilia zoned back in for the conclusion of the argument and it reminded her of how her parents used to argue. Coupled with the memories of what was supposed to be the beginning of her life was almost too much to bear, turning away from the boys who probably forgot she was even here.

_I haven’t thought about them in years, why now?_

That was a bald-faced lie and she knew it. They were in her thoughts almost every day she was with the Fang, but she had buried the happier times deep down, using her hatred of what had transpired to fuel her desire for change. To think of what once was, what could have been was wasteful, shameful even. She had no time to think about the past, it was useless to her now.

But that wasn’t really true either. It was the tether to her past that Blake had found worth in redeeming, that she was so easily able to forgive and welcome into the fight for Haven against their once brother-in-arms. It was the smile she had been told and taught to use through any adversity that came in her path that she was to smash through with her dazzling brilliance.

_“Is this really what your parents would have wanted?!”_

_“I don’t know what else to do! I don’t know what else to do…”_

It was her past and her parents that she had sealed away, and it was her past and parents that had saved her and that realization left her in tatters.

Before she knew it her hair had gone blue and skin tinged green as her body shook with unbidden tears that had been held back for so long she wasn’t sure they were capable of falling.

_I want to see them. I need to see them, I…_

Yet here she was, a rainbow-colored mess making a scene in one of the largest transportation centers of the world, and quite frankly she didn't give a damn.

As her body racked with silent sobs she felt a hand on her shoulder, brushing it off as she turned around to face Neptune, uncaring to wipe away her tears in front of this relative stranger who bore a sad but somewhat understanding smile. His arms an open invitation of comfort that would wait for an answer.

And so Ilia answered, throwing herself into the red jacket as she sobbed audibly, the boy wrapping his arms around her as she did. Sun was a silent onlooker, protecting the scene as he scanned for anyone he needed to persuade not to interrupt, though given the looks he’s been given since he entered the establishment he wasn’t all that concerned it would be an issue.

Sun chirped in mock annoyance as he spoke softly to himself. “I’m getting chastised for running off after my friends who need help and there he is helping someone he doesn’t even know past a name.” the Monkey Faunus crossed his arms, the deep smile betraying his mock annoyance.

Ilia pulled back from the comforting embrace as her sobs turned to quiet hiccups and slight shaking, the realization of what she had just done lost as she looked up to the previously annoying flirt with a new look of fascination. She was about to apologize only to be met with hands raised in a defensive gesture.

“Don’t mention it. Happy to help like someone did for me in the past.” he said as his eye subtly turned to the now approaching Wukong, something that did not go unnoticed by the now normally colored chameleon.

“Everybody all good?” Sun offered nonchalant, an easy escape to both parties that they gladly accepted with a casual nod.

“Well, I guess this is where we’ll part ways. It was nice to meet you Ilia, try not to stab anymore stray monkey partners, yeah?”

Ilia nodded with a slight grimace, though she knew it was in jest. She didn’t want either of them to leave but knew it was selfish to keep them around when they had just reunited after what seemed to be a long time. She stared at her feet in trepidation. She knew what she had to do, but could she?

“Unless you needed something?”

Ilia whipped her head up to address Neptune. “Wouldn’t I be getting in the way of your trip to Vacuo?”

Sun interjected at that, “Nah, now that the noodle nerd is here he’ll make sure we don’t get too off track.” he ignored the glare he got for the nickname and continued, “I take it that you do need something based on that answer, right?”

“Y-Yeah. I think-” she swallowed her nerves before smiling, “-I think I need to see my parents. Do you think you could come with me? I…,”

_I’m not sure I can go alone. That I deserve to go at all._

“Of course we will.”

The Chameleon Faunus wasn’t sure which of them said it first but she appreciated the both of them more than she could put into words, so she didn’t as she led them to a train headed towards the outskirts of Haven.

* * *

 

Sun wheezed as the train took off, a sickly green pallor overtaking his features as he all but fell into Neptune’s lap, Ilia sitting across from them as she heard him mumble his hatred for the steel contraptions. Neptune chucked as he ran a hand through his golden locks, Ilia noted how practiced the motion seemed for the boy and the barely noticeable tinge across his cheeks.

“You know, changing colors is kind of my thing, and while they say imitation is the highest form of flattery I think this is a bit much.”

Neptune guffawed at that as Sun just groaned and curled further into Neptune’s lap, stilling as Neptune continued his ministrations until the Faunus seemingly fell asleep.

“It amazes me that this idiot can stow away on multiple boats for weeks at a time but a single train ride leaves him this debilitated.”

Ilia hummed in agreement, though she wasn’t that easily distracted.

“You know, you surprised me.” Ilia waited for his attention before continuing, “I was ready to write you off as some idiotic flirt but you’ve got a surprising amount of depth to you.”

She struggled not to tack _for a human_ to the end of that statement.

_Baby steps._

“Uhh, thank you, I think?

Ilia rolled her eyes and decided she would continue. "So why do you do it anyway? It's pretty clear to me you'd prefer to be with him." pointing to the napping monkey, whose tail conveniently wrapped itself around the goggle-users back.

Neptune paled at that and began to rebut her but she mirrored the hand gesture he gave her earlier,

“Look you don’t have to talk to me about it just like I didn’t have to tell you why I freaked out at the station but if you want to I’m all ears, we definitely have time.”

Neptune thought it over, he really could use a sounding board for the feelings that were always threatening to drown him but to do so with the very person he had feelings for sitting in his lap, only asleep for a few minutes at best? The numerous blaring alarms in his head telling him this was a bad idea were firing on all cylinders but for whatever reason, he decided he wouldn’t pay them any mind.

“How would you approach confessing to someone who has been your best friend for the majority of your life who just spent the better part of a year chasing after a girl from another team?”

Ilia leaned back at that. She had gotten a good read on Sun in the limited time they had spent together since their alliance in Menagerie. He was thoughtful, if not a little gung-ho and brash. He cared deeply for his friends and would do anything for them and she was sure Neptune knew that, but that defeated look he was wearing implied he had already given up.

“I don’t think Blake is the problem here. It sounds more like you’re your own problem.”

“Heh. You’re really not pulling any punches are you?”

“He wouldn’t either.” pointing to the boy asleep at his waist.

Neptune couldn’t argue that even if he wanted to. He averted his gaze to the window but spoke evenly positing another question. “Have you ever been in a position where the company you are forced to keep and society as a whole expect you to act and feel a certain way, even if that way is inherently against your entire being?”

Ilia kept a neutral face, partly because was it clear the boy wasn’t finished, but she also noticed a fist clenched across the Neptune’s waist, unnoticed by the boy he was draped over as he continued to stare morosely out across the moving landscape.

“E-Even if for some miracle of a reason he did want to be with me, society wouldn’t allow it. My family is constantly in the limelight and as much as I want to fight against that for him, I’m not sure I could. The both of you are stronger than I ever think I could be, were our situations reversed. I don’t think I could handle seeing him hurt because of me so I just keep it to myself. It’s better that way.”

Ilia really doubted that. However, she didn’t feel it was her place to butt in here, not because she didn’t want to but the painful look etched on the boy’s face made her wary of doing so. She hoped that Sun, whose acting proved fruitful as Neptune returned his gaze to her was none the wiser. Instead of saying what she wanted to Ilia opted to answer his question.

“I have.”

“W-What?”

“I have been in that position. I know exactly what you’re feeling. Maybe not in the exact same context, but I do understand what you mean.”

"Oh yeah? Well, no pressure but I'm happy to listen if you want to regale your war story. As you said, we've got time." he spoke evenly and ended with a friendly grin.

Ilia chuckled, she was beginning to see the appeal of Neptune. Given some more time, she could see herself being great friends with both of them.

“Well it is relevant to where we’re going so I suppose I can share. It has to do with when I attended Atlas.”

The chameleon waited for the shocked look at the revelation that a Faunus girl attended perhaps the most militant and bigoted kingdom in Remnant.

Color her surprised, though not literally, when Neptune remained neutral at the revelation, Ilia’s shock apparent as Neptune shrugged with nonchalance.

“I met a rather eccentric girl named Neon during the Vytal Festival. She was a part of a team from Atlas and everyone seemed pretty cool about it. Though I’m going to guess that wasn’t your experience?”

“That’s certainly an understatement.”

“So? Let’s hear of your days at Atlas.”

The girl nodded as she recalled the happiest time of her life and how it all turned to ash and dust in a single moment.

* * *

 

The hustle and bustle of the wondrous mechanical city always left Ilia breathless. All the different tools and trades of family-owned businesses that still managed to keep their doors well-oiled despite the massive dust conglomerate resting within the heart of the city gave Ilia hope her dreams could come true someday.

Of course, only if she could make it out of this snowball fight alive, as she ate yet another face full of snow lobbed in her direction.

“Get your head in the game Illy-billy, we’ve got popular girls to crush beneath our feet.”

"Yeah, yeah I got it, Melia." Ilia brushed the remaining snow off her eyes as she made sure none of it got in her flowing hair as she prepared their counterattack behind their poorly constructed snowy mound of a defense.

"You know you wouldn't have to thumb through your hair if you just tied it up like I do." Melia offered, pointing to her arm of different colored hairbands that she would tie her hair up with when the situation demanded it.

Ilia rolled her eyes at that, what did everyone have against long hair?

The nuclear war of the winter going on in the middle of the closed down street was certainly not planned, most definitely not appreciated by the ruckus they were causing for the general populace, and by dust was satisfying, oh so satisfying.

Sharing an unspoken look, the two unleashed their non-stop barrage, each throwing as the other reloaded so that they gave not even an inch to their opponents. Before long they threw up their hands in surrender, unable to meet the vicious onslaught with any sort of defense.

“Now that’s what I call teamwork!”

“There’s snow way the two of us could lose,” Melia exclaimed reaching to high five her partner.

Ilia was reaching to meet her. And then promptly threw her hand back towards her side as she digested the awful pun.

“Aww, that’s no fair. Don’t put me on ice Illy.”

“You’re terrible.” she groaned before feeding Melia one of the leftover snowballs.

“You know you love me. Snow reason to get upset, you should chill.” she grinned, wiping the snow from her face.

“Can you not Melia, I’m gagging from over here.”

The two turned to meet their defeated enemies. Ilia wouldn’t exactly call them her friends, more associating with her because she was close with Melia rather than for who she was. Given how they constantly looked at her with eyes that screamed ‘who even are you’, Ilia assumed her hand-me-down clothes and backpack had something to do with their attitudes but she never let it bother her, and today wouldn’t be any different.

“You’re just upset we iced you.”

Ilia hated her puns, but she could enjoy them a bit more when they were aimed at the entitled sisters.

“Yes it’s cold, it’s snowing, snow makes ice, ice makes water, and Melia makes puns. Can we just skip to the point where you get tired of us not reacting, call us boring, and we make our way out of here? People are glaring at us and I’d rather not have to deal with some uppity business type telling us we are ‘ruining’ their day of business.”

“I guess you’re right, even if you’re no fun Gemia.”

“Yes well if we were all your brand of fun Melia we’d be in prison or Grimm food, so I’ll take being boring instead,” the second sister, Minea said with clearly practiced poise.

Ilia stayed silent, the clear fourth wheel in their group. She prided herself on being quick on her feet and she learned relatively early on that being close with Melia did not give her an open invitation to converse with the three of them together, unless of course…

“Ugh, what is that thing doing here, of all places.” Gemia pointed down the street as the three other girls turned to see a man holding his arm further down the street, he looked to be in pain.

“What? It’s just some guy holding his arm-”

Ilia stopped herself as she recognized the man from the mining settlement where her family lived just outside the city limits, his ears apparent after a harder look, she tried to ignore how frantic the adult was clearly looking for help.

"Oh, Ilia. You ought to learn that their kind aren't allowed around here."

The way Minea spat the word kind had bile crawling up Ilia’s throat.

_Just smile and go along with it. It’s nothing you haven’t done before._

Ilia let out a grin that she hoped didn’t look as disgusting as it felt, “Yeah you’re right. Let’s get outta here. I don’t want to get any dirtier than I already feel staring at him,” Ilia grabbing her scattered things hurriedly as she turned away from her fellow Faunus.

Melia gave her best friend a side look at that but moved to gather her own things as the sisters giggled in agreement at Ilia’s crude joke.

The group broke back onto the main street, Ilia at the back of their little entourage. Large dust projections skirted across the skyline of the city, illuminating the latest and greatest the SDC had to offer for the kingdom’s constituents. As the four walked along the sidewalk, all of the screens blared to announce an urgent news bulletin that they all slowed their strides to take in.

_The collapse of the Mantle settlement mines is projected to have an immeasurable impact on this season's dust cycle. Casualties of Atlas personnel minimal but the mining force has been completely decimated as a result of catalyst explosion caving in the tunnels, completely cutting off the mining crew from any hopes of escape. We will do our best to keep you updated on all of your concerns regarding the future of dust shipments as the story develops._

“It’s good that none of our people were injured.”

“Yeah, can you imagine dying in an explosion? What an awful way to…”

The world tilted off its axis. Wind, slush, and snow forgotten as her brain went into overdrive.

_No, they couldn't be…_

“-they’ve got to be more careful what if the same happened during the inspections-”

_Was he trying to find me? Did he know what happened to them?_

Her body felt airy, weightless. Like she was drifting through an abyss, her mind the only tether grounding her from being swallowed up.

_Were they both working today? They were working more to support my schooling…_

 She tried to reason that they got out. That they were fine, that they were eagerly awaiting their daughter’s weekly call. That they would laugh at her complaints about exams and tangents about dust tech and make sure she was following their rules and dote over her and… and

_They won’t be there to pick up the phone this time._

That thought cut into her a way no blade ever could replicate, jumbling up her insides like a would-be surgeon that left her anything but normal.

The snow met her knees like a pillow as her body buckled beneath her, the three girls ahead of her oblivious as her body shook out of her control.

"Hey, Ilia what do you- Ilia?"

Melia turned only to gasp in shock to see that her best friend of the better part of a year now had long flowing cerulean blue hair with and skin a pallid green flecked with blue. The thing that left her breathless though were the crystalline blue irises that shimmered with tears that patterned the otherwise pristine snow.

Her audible shock gave the sisters pause as they turned to meet the same sight and the jaded girls grabbed their friend and pulled the girl behind them, forming a protective wall.

"Ugh, I knew I didn't like you. Turns out you're one of those disgusting creatures that managed to sneak your way into civilization, eh," Gemia started, eager to get a reaction out of the Faunus girl.

Minea sized up the girl who seemed to be paying them no mind and that bothered her. How dare this girl fake who she was and then have the audacity to ignore them? She walked closer to her and looked down on her from her literal position over her.

“We’re talking to you, you monstrosity. You should listen to your betters.”

Ilia turned her eyes up, her vision blurry from her tears but unimpressed with the ugliness the girls were throwing at her, they weren't that friendly, to begin with.

_Ina, Até, I understand what you meant now._

“I’m talking to you freak.”

Ilia decided she would follow that advice, and looked up at the girl whose eyes held such vitriol and hatred for her people.

And she smiled.

She smiled through her tears, no longer hiding her true colors as she collected herself and stood up.

“I understand. I’ll be sure to avoid you from now on. I’m sorry you can’t see past your bigotry.”

Turning to leave as she came to grips that she now had no one to turn to she kept a brave facade, Minea tried one more time to get a reaction.

“Good riddance. Maybe she plans to go join the rest of them that died in that cave.” Gemia snickered, and her sister joined in, but Melia only looked to Ilia, shocked once more as the blue hair changed to yellow and her skin a volcanic red.

Ilia's blood boiled at their crude laughter. How could they make light of such a tragedy, of her grief? She turned on a dime marching back to the girls.

“Oh look here she comes again to-”

Minea’s taunt was squandered as her face met with the passionate fist of the chameleon girl, who aimed for the face that dared laugh at her plight. She fell like a wilted flower into the pretty white snow and Ilia bore down on her with the fury of a tigress.

Again and again, her fists rained down on the defenseless girl, her hair flowing wildly as she did.

Gemia had run to get help but Melia stood there watching grimacing with every blow that landed.

Ilia's fury was fueled by her sorrow. For her parents, for her kind that were subjected to treatment as second-class citizens, the burdens of society. Each blow eased that burden if only for a fleeting moment, it was enough. It felt _good,_ and that was enough for her.

As she reeled back to throw another punch, an arm on her shoulder held her back. She whipped her head up to see who would dare stop her from exacting her indignation only to see Melia shaking her head slightly as if to say that was enough. 

Ilia withered at that, letting herself be helped up by Melia, she dared to look at the hands that brutalized Minea, and the blood freely dripping from her knuckles left her sick, her skin and hair returning to their normal hue.

_I did that? I... I enjoyed that._

Ilia let herself be dragged by the arm as Melia broke into a run, escaping the scene that she caused that would no doubt have authorities involved before long. Ilia wasn't sure where Melia was taking her, but for whatever reason, she didn't find she minded. Her life was over anyway.

Before long, the two found themselves on the outskirts of the city in an alleyway wedged between two large apartment complexes, the two breathing heavily at the distance crossed.

Ilia was the first to regain enough of a semblance of breath to ask, “What are you doing?”

“Getting you out of here.” Melia rummaged through her bag that she had slipped her hands into behind her.

“What do you-”

“Illy if they find you, they’ll throw you in prison, or worse!”

Ilia snorted at that. “What do you care? My life is over anyway.”

“Not if I can help it. C’mon where is it, where is it?”

Ilia was about to question her further when a small rectangular paper was thrust in her face by the girl, beaming that she had clearly found whatever it was that she was looking for.

“What’s that?”

“I was going to surprise you during our next break with this. It’s a ship ticket to Argus. You’re always going on about mechanic mumbo-jumbo. I figured you’d enjoy a ride over there with me so you could see it all with your own eyes but….” Melia kicked the ground awkwardly as she trailed off unsure of what to say.

Ilia hesitantly reached for the outstretched paper, fingers touching it but not taking it out of her friends’ grasp. “Why are you giving me this now, knowing what just happened back there?”

“Because you need to get out of here ASAP. Because I know Atlas isn’t right for the way they treat you guys. Because I don’t care that you’re a Faunus. Because I know you’re still Illy-billy, regardless of what color your hair and skin are. Because you’re strong enough that you can keep going.” she finished thrusting the ticket into her hand.

“I-“

Melia held up a hand silencing her. “Look, we don’t have much time. Next ship leaves in a half hour, make sure you’re on it,” she turned to leave her flabbergasted friend who she probably wouldn’t ever see again. She decided to look back to her one more time and was overwhelmed by the emotion of her face that she couldn’t help it. She ran back to her friend, engulfing her in a hug.

“I’m sorry that I failed you as a friend and that you couldn’t tell me. I’m sorry I can’t do more for you, but I know you’ll make it. I’ll miss you Ilia Amitola.”

She pulled off a brown hairband before dropping it atop the ticket in the still outstretched hand.

“To remember me by.”

And with that, Ilia was alone.

* * *

 

Ilia took a breath, no longer worried about pretending that this part of her past didn’t affect her at all while also giving Neptune a chance to process everything.

The Mistralian was horrified but unsurprised by her tale. Having Sun as his team leader had him more often than not helping defend the boy from the mold of society that would sooner brush up their nose at a Faunus huntsman fighting to protect them than admit that they need protecting.

“I’d offer my condolences for everything that you’ve gone through but you look as though you’re tired of being pitied and that wasn’t the point of you telling me either.”

“You’re right. I am tired of being pitied, but I can appreciate the fact you’re observant and tactful enough to say so without coming off as a prick.”

“Well I do have to be somewhat more than just a pretty face occasionally,” he offered to try and lighten the atmosphere that was stifled by her sad tale.

“Color me surprised when you proved that you were more than that, pun intended. And I say that being absolutely not interested in your kind.”

“Humans?”

“Men.” she snorted.

Neptune chortled back at that, “Well I wouldn’t blame you on either count honestly. People suck, dudes especially.”

“I’ll drink to that.” she laughed, metaphorically raising a glass, the boy mirroring the action.

“So that doesn’t explain where we’re going like you said it would.”

Ilia smirked, “Glad to see you’re paying attention.”

“I always do. So?”

Ilia leaned back against the padded cushions of her seat, “Well...

Ilia found herself in the city of Argus without too much trouble, the impossible city a result of the Mistral-Mantle alliance to allow trade between Solitas and Anima.

She stared at her scroll and the 27 calls she had placed over the last several hours. A futile hope has that maybe someone would pick up on the other end, but that hope flickered until it was snuffed out entirely. In truth, just hearing the voice of her mother and father through the recording was a comfort that she desperately needed as she braved the completely new city on her own.

Normally she would have been elated at the marvels of the city, from its wondrous transportation to the more approachable military base that, while imposing, seemed more approachable than the standard Atlesian fleet facility.

But normalcy was something Ilia hadn’t felt for some time now. Quite frankly she wasn’t sure she’d ever feel it again, but she had a mission to complete and she was determined to see it through, and so Ilia braved the market square.

The hustle and bustle was similar to a busy day in Atlas but the atmosphere was anything but. Instead of chilling indifference, the square was the welcoming warmth of an open hearth. Everyone seemed to know one another and there seemed to be an unspoken camaraderie between the stall owners as they worked together to make the market as prolific as possible.

Ilia made her way up and down the winding roads looking to each stall as she searched out what she needed. She found herself in front of a stall that was more a tent than a stand, the aromatic aromas indicating it was what Ilia was looking for.

As soon as she stepped inside she could see the reason for the tent for the insides of the tent were tinted with dust that made the tent anywhere from translucent to reflective, allowing manipulation of how much sunlight would be let through in differing areas for the flora.

“How can I help you, child?”

Ilia was so mystified by the setup of the tent she was a bit startled at the friendly question. She turned to face an elderly woman whose smile made her heart ache as it reminded her of a warm home she no longer had.

“I’m-” Ilia swallowed as she was scared to voice her wants, telling her would make it real, the possibility of a nightmare gone as she would accept that she was buying a mourning flower, “-looking for swamp’s milkweed. I know it’s not exactly particular to this region but it has to be that.”

The woman nodded in understanding and led her to a corner of the tent before presenting the bunch of the pinkish white perennials to the girl, wrapped delicately in a fine cloth.

Ilia softened at seeing them, not knowing she would ever have to commit to this tradition of her family so soon, she accepted them graciously as though she were handling a small child. She reached inside her bag, hoping her meager saving of allowances would accommodate for the beautiful flowers. Her rummaging ceased when a soft hand found itself patting her head.

"No need, dear girl."

Ilia was confused by the statement. She would not steal from this woman and continued to search for her lien.

”Chanté shicé, Wichíncala.”

Ilia nearly dropped her bag in surprise, she had never heard anyone else use the language. The gentle woman gave her another sympathetic look and a nod as she turned to greet new customers that had entered the tent.

Ilia bowed her head uttering a quiet, “Pilamaya ye.” exiting the tent quickly lest she make a scene.

She’d made a few more stops to gather the rest of her supplies, thankful that she’d had enough to spare before making her way out of town.

Ilia wasn’t sure how far or how long she had walked, but she knew that she had to find the perfect setting, any less would be a disservice to her family.

She felt more than knew when she had found what she was looking for, the mouth of an open cave that invited her to trek deeper. Unbothered by the fact it could be dangerous, she braved the darkness of the cave, hoping the other side of the rock face would reward her for her efforts.

And reward her it did.

 For the exit of the cave revealed a natural wonder. The cave opened downward into a wondrous expanse of luscious greens that formed a canopy, shielding the area from the sun above her. The beauty was otherworldly and Ilia knew that this is where she would put them to rest.

Scoping out the landscape, she discerned a field of flowers and began her descent towards it.

As she stepped into the field she tested the ground with her foot, digging into it with the heel of her shoe, nodding to herself slightly as it gave way to the earth beneath with relative ease. She moved to the center of the area before digging out two equidistant rectangular plots with her feet.

Clearing away the dirt at her feet as she finished her task she kneeled at the plots, pulling her bag off from around her back and reaching into it before pulling out two shoddily shaped stones. She lamented the fact they weren’t nicer but she had to be reasonable with her limited funds.

She carefully placed each stone in a plot, carefully filling them back with dirt so that they wouldn’t sink or move. Pulling out the milkweed, she divided the bunch of flowers equally and placed them in gaps in the plots so that they would spread outward on each side of the tombstones.

Ilia realized that these were little more than decoration pieces, having no way to formally bury her parents. This was not the way she had been taught and it almost felt a futile attempt but she would be damned if she wouldn’t lay her parents to rest in any ways that she could. She felt she could cry but her tears ran dry. She stood up to look at the paltry memorial she made for her parents, hoping it brought them some sort of peace.

“I’m sorry Até, Ina. I wish I could honor you the way you deserve to be.”

Ilia clenched and unclenched her fists before continuing.

“I’m going to join the White Fang. It might not have been what you wanted for me but I have to do something! Losing you to the mines is something that will stay with me for the rest of my life, and Atlas was more concerned on the precious fucking dust over the lives of ‘some Faunus,’ like we were nothing more than common garden variety tools.”

Though her words were strong she felt like glass, one precarious drop from shattering beyond repair, but she would bury that deep within herself until she became tempered enough to withstand her own emotions.

She unraveled the hairband her once best friend gave her before tying up her hair in a ponytail resembling the tail of that which bore her color changing traits. She thought of her mother and knew that the time for fun was over, now it was time to get to work.

She swore to them that she wouldn't ever return here. She had heard of the Belladonna who was currently leading the Fang, his motto of keep moving forward was something she always found inspiring and she would live it from now on.

With a determined grimace, she set out to make a difference.

_I don’t think I can smile like you taught me anymore._

* * *

 

The train whirred to signal it’s stopping in the next minute or so as Neptune digested the rest of Ilia’s tale.

“We’ll be there soon. Then it’s just a quick hike to the cave mouth.”

Neptune noticed how tense Ilia looked as he tried to rouse the still inert Sun.

“And you’re sure you want to do this? We can always do something else,” Neptune offered with delicacy.

Ilia snorted, “Honestly? Not at all, I’m ready to run and never look back but, I think that I need to own my mistakes, to them especially. We’ve managed to turn the Fang around thanks to Blake and Sun but I screwed up a lot up to this point. I think I didn't let myself get closure. I didn't deserve to have it until I fixed the way people saw things."

“yhoo thoo”

Sun murmured drowsily into Neptune’s waist as he roused himself back into the land of the living, the train’s settling into the station catalyzing his return.

“Wanna try that again with some clarity?”

“The Fang is on the right track because of you too. If you weren’t there I’m pretty sure we’d all be under the rubble of Haven right about now.”

“I was only there because of you and Blake.”

Sun rolled his eyes at that as he sat upright again and stretched. “I don’t know what it is about you and her not taking a compliment when it’s deserved.”

Neptune squawked at how inappropriate that comment was and was about to chastise him, but before he could he stood up and crossed the distance to Ilia before offering her a warm smile.

“You’re allowed to celebrate your successes as much and as deeply as you learn from your mistakes.”

There he went again, spouting off twinkles of wisdom that seriously made Ilia doubt he wasn’t completely aware of everything going on around him. She admired his ability to be jovial despite everything and she realizes more and more there’s a hidden intellect that likes to show itself at critical moments that she appreciated immensely when it did.

The Monkey turned to the main hall of the train tuning back to the two who stared at him with a kind of reverence as he asked. “So, where to?”

* * *

 

The hike to the cave was a quiet one, Ilia leading as Sun and Neptune followed close behind, side-by-side. Their only ambiance the soft chirps of birds that flew overhead. Before long, they found themselves at the entrance of the cave mouth.

Ilia braced herself, inhaling deeply as she carefully made her way inside, guiding the boys to the other end.

Even knowing what the natural beauty of the hidden forest did not make it any less breathtaking, perhaps even more so now that her grief was not all-consuming like it was back then.

Sun whistled and Neptune was astonished as they took in the natural wonder, Ilia began her descent. Neptune moved to follow as he looked around in delight only for Sun to stop him, whistling to Ilia as he did to get her attention.

"You go on ahead. We'll be waiting for you here. I need to talk to my partner anyway. Take as long as you need, we'll be here."

Ilia’s eyes narrowed at that but Sun gave her a reassuring wink. He just kept surprising her as she nodded in understanding the two turning their backs to each other, Sun walking backward to his partner, and Ilia forward to face her parents.

The stroll to the floral field stretched on, almost agonizingly so, partly due to the languid way she dragged her feet. Her stomach coiled into itself as she the distance between herself and that which she swore she would never return to again shortened with each terrifying step, each slower than the last. Ilia took pride at the fact that she didn’t ever turn back or stop as she finally arrived at the clearing.

She wasn’t sure what she was expecting, perhaps the stones had sunk into the ground or fallen over. She certainly expected the milkweed to have died and become infested and weedy.

However, she was pleasantly surprised to find neither of those was the case. No, in fact, it seemed as though the canopy itself had welcomed her addition wholeheartedly, the milkweed having thrived into lovely bushes surrounding the beautifully upright stones, as if they were a bed for them, the canopy above its blanket.

The sight brought tears to Ilia’s eyes. To see that they had thrived in the makeshift resting place she had made for them essentially on the run filled her with a joy that could only be expressed through her shimmering eyes.

She bolstered her resolve and stepped forward, wiping her tears that she had no doubt would be replaced with new ones as she sat on the grass before her parents.

“Hey mom, hey dad. It’s… been a long time hasn’t it?”

She awkwardly fidgeted in place as she struggled to find the right words to explain everything that had happened, what she had seen, what she had _done._ All the words and feelings jumbled themselves together and left her an anxious mess.

Ilia could laugh at the ridiculousness of this, nervous to talk to something that couldn’t speak back to her, but she knew her heart well enough to say that even if it were a one-sided conversation, it still carried the same weight as if her mother and father were staring down at her as a small child.

“I’m afraid that I’ve disappointed the both of you. I don’t think you’d be proud of me anymore, or that you'd love me if you were here to.”

Ilia curled into herself, letting her sadness radiate color across her entire body as she wrapped her arms around her knees and rocked back and forth as she struggled to contain herself, head buried in her arms atop her knees. This was absolutely not how she intended this to go, but when did anything go as planned?

As if to answer her cries, a gentle wind cut through the canopy and wrapped itself around her, a featherlike embrace covered her from head to toe. Though the wind made her body shiver, she could feel the warmth of its message in her soul.

It was all she could do to laugh as the glass she had worked to temper within herself all but shattered and was swept away with the wind. However, instead of the broken emptiness she expected, Ilia felt vindicated. Everything she thought would destroy her just… gone in an instant, and the relief that followed was indescribable.

_Ina. Até. You always did know what to do to lift me up, didn’t you?_

She fell backward gracelessly to the grass as she looked to the canopy above her, contentedness like she never had known before washing over her in waves.

As much as Ilia would enjoy laying there for hours, she knew that there were things she needed to be doing.

Ilia jumped up, a joy in her step that she had long thought was doomed to obscurity. Turning back towards the bushes that protected their resting place, Ilia did something she hadn’t done in many years. She removed the hairband that her precious friend Melia had given her, letting her wild hair flow free once again. She knew now that she could truly be herself again, that she had her parents’ blessing, no matter what the future holds.

“Thank you for everything. I promise I’ll keep this momentum going, I won’t ever let myself feel like I did before. And if, no when I screw up again, I’ll make sure to come here so you both can set me right again.”

Ilia left the clearing in higher spirits than she ever thought possible, eager to return to her friends that awaited her.

She paused at that, not knowing when the two crossed the boundary from acquaintances to friends, happy that she could call them that all the same.

Her trek back was much shorter than when she entered, and before long she found her friends waving her down, conspicuously holding hands.

“I see you two worked everything out.”

Sun beamed as Neptune tried to hide his blush behind the Faunus, not that the blond would let him as he kept him firmly in place by his side as he turned to address Ilia.

“Yup. Thanks for your help in setting us straight. You get everything you wanted out of there?”

Instead of answering him, Ilia decided her actions would speak for her.

And so, Ilia showed them how she smiled.

**Author's Note:**

> So my prompt for this challenge was "She was going back to a place she'd hoped she would never see again." 
> 
> I realize that what came of that prompt might be a little out there or a bit of a stretch based on this and I this prompt could have been applied to quite a few people in the series but for some reason, I'd made up my mind to write about Ilia and so I did. I hope whoever's it enjoyed it!
> 
> Now the last name Amitola, as stated on the wiki, is Cherokee or Sioux for rainbow. I thought it would be interesting to inherit some of that culture into Ilia's family and upbringing, I hope I did the representation justice. I decided to settle on Lakota Sioux because it was the one I was most familiar with and the most easily researched. Below I will post the words/phrases with their meanings, but if anyone spots an error please do let me know.
> 
> Ina: Mother  
> Ate': Father  
> Chunkshi: daughter  
> Chanté Shicé, Wichíncala: I'm sorry, girl.
> 
> Of course, I inserted Seamonkeys into here because I am trash and can't just not, but also I think they were a good medium for Ilia to move forward and in turn help them move forward as well. I definitely think that they would become great friends were they allowed the time in the show to do so. 
> 
> Anyways I'll stop ranting now. Any thoughts, constructive criticisms or any interaction at all would be greatly appreciated! Let me know what you all thought.
> 
> P.S. No I have not abandoned Anamnesis I just have had a lot going on with finals and family and needed a breather and to write something else. Hopefully, the next chapter will be out soon!
> 
> Thank you for Reading!


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